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As Slade, Wizard, Cliff Richard and numerous other artists will tell you, there's nothing quite as heartwarming as having a Christmas-time hit.
And though we'd never be as cynical as to suggest that Christmas is a good time to rake in cold, hard cash, there's no denying that Christmas singles also have the aura of the word 'pension' about them.
There's just one problem: how do you write a good one? There's an entire graveyard's worth of failed Christmas anthems out there, jingling away in the hellfire. 'Surely', your inner-conscience is saying, 'surely there must be an easy way to come up with a festive favourite!?'
Well you're right: there is. Step this way to claim your guaranteed Christmas hit!